olfactory memory

i’m sixty-seven. my birthday is in two weeks. i’m at a knitting club, sitting across from a woman 3 years my junior. she works here at the rec part-time. i’m retired and filling in my schedule with community hobby clubs. “And your husband? she asks, needles sorting through tight loops. “I’m a widow.” Her handContinue reading “olfactory memory”

the human experience

6.20.2019. location: bored, sitting on a bar stool. we’re all licking the same bottle of beer. having epiphanies on love. thinking out of lust. same eyes, peeking at things in grandeur. i love the Idea, not the reality. politics matter! bullshitting to deflect in all circumstances. let me tell you a funny story: i amContinue reading “the human experience”

to be human

7.16.2020. we spoke of obligations when the door opened, leading one out. a sunny day. fled to seek Detachment. the bug snuck in and circled around us. i two-stepped as others ran near it in rage. we’re no longer barbarians, yet we still must kill what disturbs us. our fingernails have purple polish on them sinceContinue reading “to be human”

mask

8.16.2020. a trigger is an unhealed wound,” i tell her. “what aren’t you unhealed from?”she accuses, deadpan. self-deprecation stories in resharable relatability: vulnerability has been meme’d. our shadow side is seen as an Evil to be repressed. creativity is then blocked. art becomes pieces of unoriginality intertwined with undeserved superiority. self-righteousness is a balancing actContinue reading “mask”

ghosts

6.13.2019. green on our mind. materialism is all we seek. shoot your shot. beer pong mentality. fun over fulfillment. shake your ass. be liked by everyone! sleep little at night. groupthink is the routine. fancy attire. big smiles. areyouhappy?areyouhappy? disappear if it’s too hard. on people. on places. we’re obligated to no one but ourselves.Continue reading “ghosts”

grateful

6.25.2019. i used to tell myself i had big eyes to See what others cannot. a tiny mouth to whisper secrets or say it all in one breath. talk fast. the thoughts that plagued me stared at my profile. they wonder when i’ll fall again, claiming to feel my low vibration, tempting me into anotherContinue reading “grateful”

misguided soulmates

1.25.2020. like a character in my favorite books: charismatic with a carefully constructed laugh. never angry, always composed. their light dims. darkness screams at you telepathically. we hopped onto the carousel. one stepped off. the other stayed. skipped back on board. jumped off. gripped harder. the headache from the dizziness made her faint. she wokeContinue reading “misguided soulmates”

post-run

5.30.21. earbuds in, cord hanging loose, music blaring: I observe the scenery. Somber faces on auto-pilot. I wonder if my own face appears as detached or curious as I would hope. I concentrate on my movement, and ruminate on my growth. the past years have been sessions on defining boundaries. why do I seek anythingContinue reading “post-run”

Red Hoodie

I’m nineteen, walking a dog at 2 AM. I spot Red Hoodie. He pauses. I walk faster. I make the block 3 times after. 1st time: ignores his conversation partner. 2nd time: is gone. 3rd time: follows me in his car. I look at the sidewalk to guide me back home. I’m twenty-four with aContinue reading “Red Hoodie”